Hamster Series 1/2: Big Mamma Love for a Little Fur Ball

Wow. Iā€™ve never seen her hold anything with so much care.Ā 

Me: Youā€™re like a hamster-whisperer.

Barbara: LOL, Mom.

Hamster Series 1/2: Big Mamma Love for a Little Fur Ball Hamster Series 2/2: Welcome to the World’s Toughest Hamster

A Texted Conversation from the Humane Society

Barbara (My 11-year-old daughter): OMG Mom! Is that a hamster? 

Me: Yep! What do you think? He just came in. 

Barbara: He is super cute! And not like Herman. 

Me: Do you mean because heā€™s a different color?

Barbara: Yes, and heā€™s so small. 

Me: No, itā€™s just the black fur, heā€™s another Siberian hamster. Weā€™ll still have to use the rat cage. 

Barbara: LOL, OK šŸ˜€

Introductions

I walk into Barbara’s bedroom with a fried-chicken-sized box.

I open the box. A pink nose and hands tentatively climb their way out. He drops down on the soft bedding, sniffs, and runs up the ramp. Correction: he climbs up and sits in the food bowl. Cheeks all the food.

Smiles all around.

I notice a brush against my leg. I look down.

Me: Olive! Why are you standing like that with your leg up and your tail frozen? You look silly!

Stacey (laughing): I think she’s pointing.

Me: Well, I didn’t know we had an 8lb pointer! I thought you were a spoiled lap dog!

Stacey: Well, I guess Olive is saying, “Welcome to the table.”

One month later, Barbaraā€™s Bedroom

Barbara, 11, and I sit on her comforter, in her bed tent. The hamster is resting on her chest.  Barbara gently stroking his soft fur. 

Wow. Iā€™ve never seen her hold anything with so much care. 

Me: Youā€™re like a hamster-whisperer. 

Barbara: LOL, Mom. 

Me: So, sweetheart, I need to tell you something. We think Batman is not, well, a guy. 

Barbara: How can you know that? 

Me: Do you remember that Herman sometimes looked like he was sitting on a stool when he was eating? 

Barbara: Um. Not really. But okay. 

Me: Well, those were his balls. 

Barbara (with a look like when Iā€™m cooking tuna): UGH!  TMI Mom!

Me (laughing): Yep, so, you have a little lady here. 

Barbaraā€™s eyes widened. 

Barbara: Ohhhh!

She tenderly picked up her hamster and brought it to her face. 

Barbara: Your name is Batgirl now.

18 months later, January, Living Room

Barbara walks in. Her brow, creased. 

Barbara (to Stacey and me): So, Batgirl is acting really weird. She keeps shaking. Sheā€™s been like this all day. 

We go and check. Itā€™s nighttime – her awake time. Her eyes are closed. Sheā€™s walking around like a drunk on a boat. 

Stacey walks away and blows her nose; puts on her reading glasses. Which can only mean one thing: bad news, but she has to be sure. I look and exchange a worried glance with Stacey and take the ramp from Batgirlā€™s cage.

Me: Barbara, can you see what soft foods are in the fridge? 

Barbara (rummaging) : Mom, the yogurt is moldy. 

Barbara: The cottage cheese is, too. 

Me: Hummus? 

Barbara: Nope. 

Me: Doh.

Stacey: You could make her a hard-boiled egg. 

I get the egg going. Stacey jumps up from the couch and grabs sugar, salt, and a glass. And a syringe. 

Barbara: Whatā€™s that? 

Stacey: Itā€™s like Gatorade for hamsters. It will help her recover. 

Barbara: From what? 

Stacey: She had a stroke, sweetheart. 

Stacey pulls up some hamster Gatorade into the syringe. Batgirl keeps missing the drop on the end. We all cringe. I blow my nose, and Batgirl falls over from surprise on her bedding. Thank god she has nowhere to go. 

We get half a teaspoon of hamster Gatorade in Batgirl in the next 10 minutes. 

We place a little hard-boiled egg by her. She wobbles over and cheeks the white. And, with the worldā€™s tiniest, pinkest paws, she takes the yolk and greedily eats.

Collective sigh of relief. 

We flop on the couch. I put my arm around Barbara. 

Barbara (starting to cry): Mom, itā€™s not fair.. 

Me (starting to cry, also): I know, sweetheart. Iā€™m sorry. 

Stacey gives me that ā€œwhoā€™s gonna tell herā€ look.

Me: Barbara, we donā€™t know how long she will live. So the only thing you can do is love her now. 

Barbara (sniffling): Do you think we can make her one of those ceramic paw-print things like we did for Herman?

Stacey: Absolutely.

Why?

After verifying that Batgirl is still alive the next morning, I plod over to my desk for writing time.

With a heavy heart, this story pours out with tears. I stop, blow my nose, and wonder.

Why? Why am I so sad? I get that I’m empathetic. And highly sensitive. I feel the big grief from Barbara and Stacey. But there’s more.

How am I so tightly-tied to this one little life? It’s not like Stacey and I played a lot with her.

One long week later hand-feeding soft foods

Barbara (yelling from her room): MOM! 

Me (stomach sinking): Coming! 

Barbara: LOOK! Batgirl is almost back to her old self! 

Me: Thatā€™s great, sweetheart.

Barbara: And sheā€™s eating and drinking by herself!

Happy dances all around.

READ ON >> Hamster Series 2/2: Welcome to the World’s Toughest Hamster

POEM: Only Today

How easy it is
to regret yesterday, 
worry of tomorrow,
and miss today

the Only Day
we ever have
to live and
love

 others, 
   the world,
     or a single leaf. 

The SoulJourner QUESTion

God, pets. Why did we humans domesticate animals that come and go too quickly? And THANK GOD we did. Iā€™m not gonna lie to you, sometimes I miss the vast, open spaces of couple-time. However, my heart is bigger and fuller than I knew possible, with my sah-weetness of a Chiweenie, Olive. And I’m more “living in the moment” than I ever have been, in partial thanks to her.

Serious Prompt: How can you love yourself now? And now? And now? What do you need to let go of to bring yourself into present tense acceptance?

Fun Prompt: EITHER POST A PICTURE OR answer…what is one ridiculous thing you do for your pet?

READ ON >> Hamster Series 2/2: Welcome to the World’s Toughest Hamster

Author: Heidi Esther

Swimmer, cheerleader from the South Side. Three bros, mom and dad Can bait my own hook. Civil Engineer- turned-fundraiser. Mamma of two lights Everyday blessed. Divorce, job loss, plus codependence, Woman- loving-woman awakening. Boundaries, Forgiveness, Patience, & Grace. Today, Tomorrow, New chances for life.

Hello!

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