So, I didn’t know I was IN a closet…

Yes, I’m not going to pay $25 for two Panera Salads for lunch for someone I don’t like!

Playdate Gone South

She slammed a door in my face! 

Mary, my best friend. 

I just couldn’t believe it – I froze.  I don’t know if the source of our toddlers’ fight was my son or her daughter. Whatever. That was bullshit. 

For the record, no friend has ever slammed a door in my face. 

seriously, i made 3 new year’s resolutions to be a better friend. see what – or who – knocks on heidi’s door next!

Country Club Series 2/2: Aunt Flo Strikes Back

Country Club Series 1/2: It’s the Most Aunt-Flo-der-ful, Country Club Series 2/2: Aunt Flo Strikes Back

After one beer and 14 hours of work

I’m sure it’s sweat. It’s after dark and still in the 90s. 

I scan the landscape. For the darkest path. In case Aunt Flo decided not to leave. Bee-atch.

Okay, can’t walk-run to my car. My purse is in the office. Breathe. My next steps:

  1. Cross the Welcome station
  2. Walk ½ way up the Circle Drive 
  3. Get past the Valet-guarded doors
  4. Dodge outcoming bathroom crowd
  5. Walk 20 feet into a No-Escaping-Notice office 

I’m sure I’m fine.

is she fine? OMG, I can’t even watch. Why didn’t she double up, dear god, why???

Country Club Series 1/2: It’s the most Aunt Flo-der-ful…

Country Club Series 1/2: It’s the Most Aunt-Flo-der-ful, Country Club Series 2/2: Aunt Flo Strikes Back

Biggest. Party. Of. The. Year.

Two giant tents – filled with properly-placed napkins and gourmet picnic food on silver chafing dishes. A live pop cover band tests their equipment, which means you don’t have to bring your 9-iron today. Or plaid pants. Unless you really want to. 

can you smell the cut grass and the grill? Read more to hear about “the wrinkle”
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