I typed this into the chat box, to a message to my wife. No, no, both of us are healthy middle-aged people. Just as tired and achey as the next middle-aged parents, coming to grips with sore hips, backs, and eyes that now need reading glasses. For those minor inconveniences, I am daily grateful. Nothing a little more yoga, patience, and five pairs of expertly-placed reading glasses around the house can’t solve.
In earnest, we are grappling with monthly expenses, two messy middles in career paths, and impending children in college. Oh, and trying to live lives truer to ourselves.
Sometimes, I feel we all get caught in the thick of the messy middle and forget to come up for air. To look where we’re actually headed. Questions like these shake me awake daily. After decades of never coming up for air. So I can continue to save, live, and spend a life truer to myself.
So, let me ask you this question. What if you were dying? What would you spend your savings on? Your time? I bet your answer would be something other than I dunno. And, I’m gonna bet you might use it – at least some – for something different than you are doing now.
I recently devoured a book, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, by former palliative care professional and songwriter, Bronnie Ware. She spent so much time at the bedsides of people during their sunset, she noticed a pattern. A pattern of regret. Here they are.
- I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
- I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
- I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
- I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
- I wish that I had let myself be happier.
How do those hit you, right now?
Other questions… Are you working hard, but have zero motivation behind it? Or do you have a hard time taking time off? Do you feel friends are optional? Do you never cut yourself slack?
If you answered yes to any of the above, those are the fast track to Regrets-ville. To not spending your savings to live. You are saving your money to live at some other point in your life. But, do not despair. Keep reading!
And my next question: who are you living your life for? Who are you trying to prove yourself to? Your parents? Your kids? Your spouse? Your dog? Your boss? The unresolved shame inside of you? If the answer is not YOU, first and foremost, you are giving your life away. Now, for the great news!
You were put here for a reason. While that reason might revolve around others, You are still YOU. YOU have YOU-nique brilliance. YOU, as human being, MATTER. YOU, at your full potential, will be better equipped to help anyone in your circle. You will know how to heal yourself. You will know how to save, live, and spend a life truer to yourself.
So, my friend and beautiful soul. Are you ready to take Two Steps to bypass regret and
Start living regret-free?
Here are two steps to carve a way forward. To save and live for what really matters.
